It’s a sh*tshow. It’s not going to be great. But I feel way more prepared for today than I would have been if I wasn’t a part of this community; a receiver of your insights and research and how it bounces around the brains of like-minded folk.
I feel better able to absorb (am I more used to game that the powerful are playing?) this news, and also better resigned (and excited ?) to be a hopeful role-model (as you noted) and rally the team. Thank you, everyone, for being here.
Tomorrow is a new day. But - go gently for a bit xo
Kristy, thank you so much. I was talking to my Dad this morning, while I wrote this, and was sharing how a lot of my friends have...faded away. They are not comfortable with what I'm voicing, even if they are agreeing with me. They can't be "seen" to be putting a like to my IG posts and so on. He asked how I cope. I said - by connecting with everyone here (as well as select friends, and my family, who get it, and are willing to talk about what is actually happening...now!).
Thanks for writing this Kristy, a great reminder to breathe in , breathe out and be that island of calm sanity in amoungst the chaos of the news and everyones wild reactions.
This community and book also helps make sense of why this clusterfuck has happened, its part of the collapse narrative. Lets get on with life and living fully :)
Totally with you on the sh*tshow Kristy. I am not angry (yet!) but feel very sad for my American friends and family . I am not going to analyze any of it but at the right time send out the clarion call to those who will stand firm against bullying, sexist, racist actions.
Your post and the knowledge that women have climbed those patriarchal parapets before brings me to a calm centre and I know we will do it again and again if need be. We are better prepared and we have networks and each other in sisterhood solidarity. We also have thoughtful males willing to step into the light we will cast to push out any darkness. Role models with courage and character is our job once more. On!On!
There is more in each of us that we are aware of. More beauty of heart and soul, more imagination, more strength, more capacity to go deep inside and find a fuel for life that creates the kind of connections with one another that heal this depth of grief. The first time Trump won, I lay in my bed unable to sleep, shaking and crying because it brought back the pain of every sexual harm that had been committed on my body. This time, what I feel is wisdom. I feel like it is going to be a time of carefully listening to that inner voice of moral courage and to one another in a way that forms community and, possibly, entirely new tables.
Yes. I feel the same. I feel resolved. Resolved to role-model like a warrior and get very vigilant in my commitment to love and nature and all those things that have felt like wafty, nice-to-haves...but are now EVERYTHING that is left. Courage to you, Madeleine.
My theologian friend has been asked to speak to a Ukraine audience on Saturday. The topic: love in a time of war. She shared the structure of her talk with me today. “Love looks like: heartbreak; judgement/discernment/truthtelling; grace; crucifixion (the ability to be with unimaginable suffering); community.
There is so much wisdom and resonance in that.
Today I’m experiencing heartbreak and crucifixion. Maybe judgement. Tomorrow maybe I’ll find grace. Here, I find community.
Agree Madeleine. The first time Trump won, I joined the Women’s March at Hyde Park in Sydney, very much the activist. This time round, I feel the same “careful listening” on all sides, and love.
You can be damn sure that millions of men across the world are very disappointed in the result of the election. Don't think for a moment that women are the only group feeling totaaly downcast this morning. We men had high hopes for the first female president and the defeat of that monster Trump.
He’s a convicted felon and a rapist. There’s an inherent problem in the US justice system here that he can be re-elected and then absolve himself of all his sins.
The ultimate narcissist and his cronies (Musk, Bezos et al) taking the power into his hands and looking at the crowd and almost worshipping their stupidity. This is the virus way more dangerous than COVID
I wish i never but i did have a quick look at Sky news last night and Paul Murray goes on to say how disgusting and weak Kamala Harris was for not addressing the crowd last night on eve of defeat. Goes on to say it says everything about who she is blah blah blah.
Yet Trump still doesn't even accept the result of 2020, started a riot AND didn't even attend the official handover ceremony to Joe Biden. First president in history not to.
Just packed his bag and left the Whitehouse like a spoilt brat.
I’m a woman. I’m scared, not surprised, sad, disappointed, disenchanted, immobilised with grief… I used to be an activist working to get more women into senior positions of power and leadership. I stopped with a jolt of recognition 4 years ago. After 20 years of work, there were more women at the top but the power structures had not changed. Women were there conditionally. Patriarchy had not changed. Some of my best women friends were sacked from the top jobs bc Ministers/board chairs didn’t like being disagreed with. Misogyny, patriarchy, racism, elitism, capitalism, rule.
I’m sad beyond measure. What of women in the US? How fucking stupid are they?? Why weren’t they voting for themselves? Well … they’ve been well trained, survival depends on it… to devalue themselves, be silenced, erased… unless they comply with the lie… of their/our inferiority/ our inability to be trusted with power… They will suffer. Probably. The women in Ukraine, Palestine, the Sudan, Pacific nations, and any country really where survival depends on decisions made by men with power and self interest at stake will suffer more. They are at risk. We’re all at risk. The truth of our situation may be a clarion call. We may be shaken awake… or not? 🤷🏼♂️
Again, conversation with my Dad this morning...he asked the same. I do think the water is going to have to be boiling before we're prepared to jump out.
I am a man and have weighed-in on this discussion once already but I think you need to hear this. Women need to stop whining about the patriarchy and get on with life using the path that Kamala has set down for you. She is brave. She thinks for herself and she has overcome the odds of a difficult chidhood to become a lawyer, a senetor, and vice president of the U.S.A. I think that your own sisterhood has let you down in this election. Where were they on election day when they were casting their secret ballot? Where were those southern belles from the christian right when they were casting their secrete ballot and not giving two hoots for a poor woman who might desperatly needed the option of an abortion? Give your heads a shake ladies.
Hey J, there is a lot in that comment and very happy to have different perspectives expressed here. But I'm very keen to keep the tone cool - no lectures, no accusatory language directed at others. The answers to the questions you pose are covered elsewhere in the thread (as to why women might vote against their interests)...definitely go and have a read.
As an American waking up to the nightmare my neighbors have voted in, I am also wondering if I can forgive women. Women could have turned this election on its head. Instead, the majority of the women surrounding me (I live in Tennessee) willingly cast their vote for this person. Yes, there is a societal, fundamental inequality we all need to grapple with. And yet, from this viewpoint is sure seems like most don't care.
You probably picked up the phenomenon of women being told by their husbands how to vote. Fear is very real. So there's that.
There's also the fact that women are tied up. All the issues at play in the world - women get harder and faster by them. They are busy bringing up the kids, dealing with grocery bills etc. Elections are in the middle of the day on a Tuesday...
All excellent points that, like you said, point to the root issue of patriarchy. I hope the world doesn't equate America with Trump now, and yet I have such fear that he is going to make it impossible not to.
I like the concept of “emergence”, the “spontaneous creation of order and functionality from the bottom up” as seen in the flocking behaviour of birds that spontaneously become synchronised in flight. Isn’t that how some of the greatest social change and resistance has happened. We’ve seen how being “led” top down by corporate media, billionaires, the party system etc. has created this mess. Conscious individuals, making daily kind and aware choices, finding a way to create beauty daily, resisting the voices of the media etc. may help us powerfully emerge from this, synchronised as a community and wiser. Or at least find beauty, purpose and grace. Maybe that’s where it all begins and ends anyway.
Maybe I'm misunderstanding, but I feel like it doesn't turbo eject role modeling, though? I see role modeling as living truthfully from one's values rather than purposefully taking a position of influence. When someone lives out of humility, those who can see it know what it looks like and then can define the contours of their own life in that humble spirit, too. So many of us on this thread do that for one another without even realizing it. You do it constantly, Sarah, in your willingness to not center yourself or position yourself as an authority.
My language is probably not being accurate enough. You're right, the enactment of this role modelling is a lot more humble and gentle. My "turbo-charged" tone is more about the vigilance and steadfastness and commitment that we are being invited to embody.
Role modeling is key. But what we role model must be about truth, inclusion , kindness, passion and generosity. Humility is how we roll but also keeping an eye on the collective goal and offering our hands and hearts to get the job done together.
I do believe too that people and communities who live intentionally and who form their hearts and spirits around relationship find a beauty, purpose, and grace that cannot be commodified. I keep thinking of the Wild episode with Ian McGilchrist and how he spoke about something ineffable that happens between neurons firing and creating new pathways. I think he asked the question about what is there in that space, exactly? Whatever it is, it is possibility, and that is powerful. I'm probably not articulating him very well at all, here. After my grief and anger have burned brightly, a conviction to search for beauty will rise from those ashes and be galvanized by the power of that possibility of living beautifully. I think of Dorothy Day and how she always used to quote Dostoyevsky and, after praying each day in solitude and quiet, she would say how "beauty will save the world".
She is a hero of mine from my growing up Catholic days. 😊She had an abortion and worked tirelessly with and for the poor. A radical social activist who remains a role model for the ages.
If the identity politics of United States continues to ignore class dynamics nothing will change, and the college educated suburban liberals in this country will continue to feel confused and hurt. Try asking yourself what it is about the woman and her party who just won the presidency in Mexico that led her to victory.
I very much agree - class dynamics are so often ignored. I often think we view things through gender and race lenses...because gender and race can't be changed. Class can. Class issues demand change from all of us.
I agree Belemu. Every time Kamala said she was going to make things better for the middle class I reacted. What about the poor? The working classes who were once employed until the decision to move manufacturing to places where labour was cheap. Those who through no fault of their own became unemployed, were abandoned, their communities dissolved… then the inevitable trajectories followed. People reacted predictably in this election by looking past the character of the man to the hope he would restore … of course it’s an illusion, a lie… and it was men like him that created a world that relied on and exploited cheap labour … that created a ‘working class’…People who frequently accept their lot as long as they have sufficient money for food and to raise their kids. Who, like women, are dependent on patriarchal structures for survival… so much is broken… and this elected man and his cronies will not be the ones to fix it …
We were not prepared for the support Kamala Harris needed to become President. Ground work was not in place. We need to revisit Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B Anthony who worked daily their entire lives educating . They never saw the fruition of their life’s work . But their work brought about Women’s Rights. If you have a moral compass and willingness to work you can move forward inch by inch.We must choose a focus and not splinter into factions.
Yes and on the Democratic’s strategy - the intention to vote for Harris so Trump does not get in, not enough. Intention in one’s decision is key - you make a choice because you have strong inclination and faith in that; not to avoid something …
Thank you so much for writing (& sourcing) this Sarah. And for writing it now. It addresses exactly a question I want heard.
I too feel an entirely different reaction to Trump’s first win. This outcome is a chosen one. A deliberate decision, made with knowledge. It lays a lot of stuff clear.
And thanks for this place here. Thank god for this community you have built.
I'm struggling with the fact that 52% of white women voted Trump into office. So I'm also asking myself, "Can I forgive my fellow women?" WTF. I'm struggling with this one.
I'm struggling with that, too. Tho, we have to remember it's not just about who voted for whom. Male insecurity has driven the Trump and the Project 25 agendas. Toxic men with too much power (Musk, Joe rogan etc) are fueling things to suit their own mysoginist ends. The fact women have voted for all this exposes that this is about patriarchy.
A few people have also expressed their personal experience - fear sees women go silent, do what their husband says, stick to the "tribe" etc.
I think my trust in *most* men eroded in 2016. But I still had trust in women. Now, my trust in women is dependent on geography. If I'm in my area in New England, I know where most women stand. If I travel south, I'll be more on guard with both men... and women.
I read this through my tears. Thank you, Sarah, and Anya, for your personal take. I don't feel as alone. The struggle to forgive men has been the struggle of my life. That's sounding pretty hyperbolic, but I think it's true. And this election is a mirror reflecting it all back. Men (especially young men) came out in droves in this election. I think I heard that more women voted for Biden in 2020 than they voted for Harris. I think more and more women will stay quiet. Where do we go from here?
We do stay quiet. I stayed quiet in the past and the truth is that I can't explain why. I do not know why I stayed quiet, maybe I didn't trust my own judgement, I didn't recognise the mistreatment. I froze when I read your words just now.
The problem is conflict , and our inability to fight fairly and completely. I understand the dilemma, to lower your guard to someone who has the ability to render your heart. It’s almost impossible. But I think the solution is in the fight. I have been thinking about this a lot lately. THE first choice in a partner, friend or business partner is how they deal with conflict , either with you , or more importantly with a stranger they can’t get something from.
This behaviour is the baseline of a human being, life is hard and stressful, and how someone deals y stress immediately tells you their values, and character.
Love this conversation. I too have noticed a huge difference to how this feels in my body and heart, compared to 2016. Less of a debilitating drowning, but rather a deep constant hum of grief, which feels very right, embracing and maybe even transitory??
The power of now having the scaffolding of this community, and the different narratives and greater curiosity I have been gifted with has changed everything.
Tara Brach says "I promise to love this world, in sickness and in health, til death do us part." Today, loving the world is looking like tending to my exhaustion. I trust that love will let me know when it is calling me to action, but right now it's a good night's sleep, after soaking up all of your wisdom here.
Sarah, I can't forgive US men and to a certain extent Australian men. I posted on X that I hoped the American women would carry the day, but many of them, including the vast majority of mainstream Republican men voted for Trump. The US is more polarised and fractured than ever before, possibly irrevocably... Trump represents all the reactionary, sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic and elitist tendencies of the conservative half of the US. 20 years of reactionary SCOTUS decisions coming up. The country may never recover. Australia reflects some of this - we have another adversarial fight going on between, essentially, two conservative major parties who are the only parties who can form Government. In Queensland, they are heading towards a US style backlash against pro-women and welfare policies, such as the Right to Choose, child care and action on violence against women. In Australia, there have been 75 deaths of women at the hands of men and Governments are doing nothing about it. I'm at a loss. No more words!
Yes, I'm watching Dutton et al capitalising on the momentum and it's cringe and scary. I just hope Australians jump from the warming pot on the stove and mobilise before it's too late.
Look into supporting minor parties and independents. Get involved at the grassroots level in your constituency. Lots of folk already doing great work in this realm. The more the merrier. We want a minority government with a strong cross bench to foster a more progressive political sphere and break up the stranglehold the major parties and their donors/powerful lobbyists have on our government. It will be a critical fork in the road in the Australian social/cultural landscape. Get active!
I had to leave X yesterday for good after being slammed and called horrible things by far right men and a few women (mostly Americans but some Australians) including an idiot, a retard, ugly, stupid, a commie, go to the kitchen, get an abortion, how many cats, etc. So much hate out there it’s frightening. What did I write? I said we would never vote for someone like Trump in Australia.
It’s a sh*tshow. It’s not going to be great. But I feel way more prepared for today than I would have been if I wasn’t a part of this community; a receiver of your insights and research and how it bounces around the brains of like-minded folk.
I feel better able to absorb (am I more used to game that the powerful are playing?) this news, and also better resigned (and excited ?) to be a hopeful role-model (as you noted) and rally the team. Thank you, everyone, for being here.
Tomorrow is a new day. But - go gently for a bit xo
Kristy, thank you so much. I was talking to my Dad this morning, while I wrote this, and was sharing how a lot of my friends have...faded away. They are not comfortable with what I'm voicing, even if they are agreeing with me. They can't be "seen" to be putting a like to my IG posts and so on. He asked how I cope. I said - by connecting with everyone here (as well as select friends, and my family, who get it, and are willing to talk about what is actually happening...now!).
I'm inexpressibly grateful for this. Thank you and yes, onward.
I too feel better able to absorb this news for having been reading this book.
(with all it's typos 😂🫶🏻) ...thanks emma x
It is our capacity to feel which allows us the capacity to deal 😂
Not the opposite , to hold is to become fragile or sick
Thanks for writing this Kristy, a great reminder to breathe in , breathe out and be that island of calm sanity in amoungst the chaos of the news and everyones wild reactions.
This community and book also helps make sense of why this clusterfuck has happened, its part of the collapse narrative. Lets get on with life and living fully :)
Totally with you on the sh*tshow Kristy. I am not angry (yet!) but feel very sad for my American friends and family . I am not going to analyze any of it but at the right time send out the clarion call to those who will stand firm against bullying, sexist, racist actions.
Your post and the knowledge that women have climbed those patriarchal parapets before brings me to a calm centre and I know we will do it again and again if need be. We are better prepared and we have networks and each other in sisterhood solidarity. We also have thoughtful males willing to step into the light we will cast to push out any darkness. Role models with courage and character is our job once more. On!On!
There is more in each of us that we are aware of. More beauty of heart and soul, more imagination, more strength, more capacity to go deep inside and find a fuel for life that creates the kind of connections with one another that heal this depth of grief. The first time Trump won, I lay in my bed unable to sleep, shaking and crying because it brought back the pain of every sexual harm that had been committed on my body. This time, what I feel is wisdom. I feel like it is going to be a time of carefully listening to that inner voice of moral courage and to one another in a way that forms community and, possibly, entirely new tables.
Yes. I feel the same. I feel resolved. Resolved to role-model like a warrior and get very vigilant in my commitment to love and nature and all those things that have felt like wafty, nice-to-haves...but are now EVERYTHING that is left. Courage to you, Madeleine.
My theologian friend has been asked to speak to a Ukraine audience on Saturday. The topic: love in a time of war. She shared the structure of her talk with me today. “Love looks like: heartbreak; judgement/discernment/truthtelling; grace; crucifixion (the ability to be with unimaginable suffering); community.
There is so much wisdom and resonance in that.
Today I’m experiencing heartbreak and crucifixion. Maybe judgement. Tomorrow maybe I’ll find grace. Here, I find community.
All this may help me discern right action.
I love this. If she shares a copy of her speech, maybe ask if you could share it with us here?
I love this, Deborah. Thank you for sharing.
Oh, yes. This 1000 times yes.
Agree Madeleine. The first time Trump won, I joined the Women’s March at Hyde Park in Sydney, very much the activist. This time round, I feel the same “careful listening” on all sides, and love.
Yes, different kind of work ahead now.
You can be damn sure that millions of men across the world are very disappointed in the result of the election. Don't think for a moment that women are the only group feeling totaaly downcast this morning. We men had high hopes for the first female president and the defeat of that monster Trump.
I have thought for many a moment that many men are feeling as you say - per the subtitle of the article!
Yes, yes, J!
He’s a convicted felon and a rapist. There’s an inherent problem in the US justice system here that he can be re-elected and then absolve himself of all his sins.
The ultimate narcissist and his cronies (Musk, Bezos et al) taking the power into his hands and looking at the crowd and almost worshipping their stupidity. This is the virus way more dangerous than COVID
It's extra galling when the Republicans run on the line they're going to counter the power of the elites.
I wish i never but i did have a quick look at Sky news last night and Paul Murray goes on to say how disgusting and weak Kamala Harris was for not addressing the crowd last night on eve of defeat. Goes on to say it says everything about who she is blah blah blah.
Yet Trump still doesn't even accept the result of 2020, started a riot AND didn't even attend the official handover ceremony to Joe Biden. First president in history not to.
Just packed his bag and left the Whitehouse like a spoilt brat.
The hypocrisy is what drives me crazy.
I’m a woman. I’m scared, not surprised, sad, disappointed, disenchanted, immobilised with grief… I used to be an activist working to get more women into senior positions of power and leadership. I stopped with a jolt of recognition 4 years ago. After 20 years of work, there were more women at the top but the power structures had not changed. Women were there conditionally. Patriarchy had not changed. Some of my best women friends were sacked from the top jobs bc Ministers/board chairs didn’t like being disagreed with. Misogyny, patriarchy, racism, elitism, capitalism, rule.
I’m sad beyond measure. What of women in the US? How fucking stupid are they?? Why weren’t they voting for themselves? Well … they’ve been well trained, survival depends on it… to devalue themselves, be silenced, erased… unless they comply with the lie… of their/our inferiority/ our inability to be trusted with power… They will suffer. Probably. The women in Ukraine, Palestine, the Sudan, Pacific nations, and any country really where survival depends on decisions made by men with power and self interest at stake will suffer more. They are at risk. We’re all at risk. The truth of our situation may be a clarion call. We may be shaken awake… or not? 🤷🏼♂️
Now I weep and quake.
Again, conversation with my Dad this morning...he asked the same. I do think the water is going to have to be boiling before we're prepared to jump out.
And it will be too late?!
well, yes. But enough of us jump out early, we can help the others.
A global hug from Canada to you in Australia, Deborah, as you honour that grief. Keep telling the truth with your heart and your life.
Deborah,
I am a man and have weighed-in on this discussion once already but I think you need to hear this. Women need to stop whining about the patriarchy and get on with life using the path that Kamala has set down for you. She is brave. She thinks for herself and she has overcome the odds of a difficult chidhood to become a lawyer, a senetor, and vice president of the U.S.A. I think that your own sisterhood has let you down in this election. Where were they on election day when they were casting their secret ballot? Where were those southern belles from the christian right when they were casting their secrete ballot and not giving two hoots for a poor woman who might desperatly needed the option of an abortion? Give your heads a shake ladies.
Hey J, there is a lot in that comment and very happy to have different perspectives expressed here. But I'm very keen to keep the tone cool - no lectures, no accusatory language directed at others. The answers to the questions you pose are covered elsewhere in the thread (as to why women might vote against their interests)...definitely go and have a read.
As an American waking up to the nightmare my neighbors have voted in, I am also wondering if I can forgive women. Women could have turned this election on its head. Instead, the majority of the women surrounding me (I live in Tennessee) willingly cast their vote for this person. Yes, there is a societal, fundamental inequality we all need to grapple with. And yet, from this viewpoint is sure seems like most don't care.
Also, Terran Shea makes a point below - women do go quiet when things get dangerous.
Yes, it's the power of patriarchy.
You probably picked up the phenomenon of women being told by their husbands how to vote. Fear is very real. So there's that.
There's also the fact that women are tied up. All the issues at play in the world - women get harder and faster by them. They are busy bringing up the kids, dealing with grocery bills etc. Elections are in the middle of the day on a Tuesday...
All excellent points that, like you said, point to the root issue of patriarchy. I hope the world doesn't equate America with Trump now, and yet I have such fear that he is going to make it impossible not to.
I like the concept of “emergence”, the “spontaneous creation of order and functionality from the bottom up” as seen in the flocking behaviour of birds that spontaneously become synchronised in flight. Isn’t that how some of the greatest social change and resistance has happened. We’ve seen how being “led” top down by corporate media, billionaires, the party system etc. has created this mess. Conscious individuals, making daily kind and aware choices, finding a way to create beauty daily, resisting the voices of the media etc. may help us powerfully emerge from this, synchronised as a community and wiser. Or at least find beauty, purpose and grace. Maybe that’s where it all begins and ends anyway.
I think you are very right.
So...this leaves role-modelling the fuck out of the situation!
Maybe I'm misunderstanding, but I feel like it doesn't turbo eject role modeling, though? I see role modeling as living truthfully from one's values rather than purposefully taking a position of influence. When someone lives out of humility, those who can see it know what it looks like and then can define the contours of their own life in that humble spirit, too. So many of us on this thread do that for one another without even realizing it. You do it constantly, Sarah, in your willingness to not center yourself or position yourself as an authority.
My language is probably not being accurate enough. You're right, the enactment of this role modelling is a lot more humble and gentle. My "turbo-charged" tone is more about the vigilance and steadfastness and commitment that we are being invited to embody.
ah, thank you for clarifying.
Role modeling is key. But what we role model must be about truth, inclusion , kindness, passion and generosity. Humility is how we roll but also keeping an eye on the collective goal and offering our hands and hearts to get the job done together.
I do believe too that people and communities who live intentionally and who form their hearts and spirits around relationship find a beauty, purpose, and grace that cannot be commodified. I keep thinking of the Wild episode with Ian McGilchrist and how he spoke about something ineffable that happens between neurons firing and creating new pathways. I think he asked the question about what is there in that space, exactly? Whatever it is, it is possibility, and that is powerful. I'm probably not articulating him very well at all, here. After my grief and anger have burned brightly, a conviction to search for beauty will rise from those ashes and be galvanized by the power of that possibility of living beautifully. I think of Dorothy Day and how she always used to quote Dostoyevsky and, after praying each day in solitude and quiet, she would say how "beauty will save the world".
Madeleine, that DD contribution is divine. Thank you x
She is a hero of mine from my growing up Catholic days. 😊She had an abortion and worked tirelessly with and for the poor. A radical social activist who remains a role model for the ages.
Mine too. Still is. “don’t call us saints” has stayed with me for years.
If the identity politics of United States continues to ignore class dynamics nothing will change, and the college educated suburban liberals in this country will continue to feel confused and hurt. Try asking yourself what it is about the woman and her party who just won the presidency in Mexico that led her to victory.
I very much agree - class dynamics are so often ignored. I often think we view things through gender and race lenses...because gender and race can't be changed. Class can. Class issues demand change from all of us.
I cringed whenever a newscaster said "college-educated vs. non-college educated", which was a lot.
I agree Belemu. Every time Kamala said she was going to make things better for the middle class I reacted. What about the poor? The working classes who were once employed until the decision to move manufacturing to places where labour was cheap. Those who through no fault of their own became unemployed, were abandoned, their communities dissolved… then the inevitable trajectories followed. People reacted predictably in this election by looking past the character of the man to the hope he would restore … of course it’s an illusion, a lie… and it was men like him that created a world that relied on and exploited cheap labour … that created a ‘working class’…People who frequently accept their lot as long as they have sufficient money for food and to raise their kids. Who, like women, are dependent on patriarchal structures for survival… so much is broken… and this elected man and his cronies will not be the ones to fix it …
I'm more than happy for women to run this planet. Men have given the world nothing but misery with their endless pursuit of conflict and greed.
Per that Will Farrell speech at some awards night....
I'm more Perry Farrell.
We were not prepared for the support Kamala Harris needed to become President. Ground work was not in place. We need to revisit Elizabeth Cady Stanton and Susan B Anthony who worked daily their entire lives educating . They never saw the fruition of their life’s work . But their work brought about Women’s Rights. If you have a moral compass and willingness to work you can move forward inch by inch.We must choose a focus and not splinter into factions.
This is what my American husband said- if Biden had stepped down to begin with she would have had a better chance.
Yes the New York Times' Daily podcast just discussed this.
Yes and on the Democratic’s strategy - the intention to vote for Harris so Trump does not get in, not enough. Intention in one’s decision is key - you make a choice because you have strong inclination and faith in that; not to avoid something …
Thank you so much for writing (& sourcing) this Sarah. And for writing it now. It addresses exactly a question I want heard.
I too feel an entirely different reaction to Trump’s first win. This outcome is a chosen one. A deliberate decision, made with knowledge. It lays a lot of stuff clear.
And thanks for this place here. Thank god for this community you have built.
I agree with you - this time it was very deliberate. I don't want to forget that.
or dismiss it.
I'm struggling with the fact that 52% of white women voted Trump into office. So I'm also asking myself, "Can I forgive my fellow women?" WTF. I'm struggling with this one.
I'm struggling with that, too. Tho, we have to remember it's not just about who voted for whom. Male insecurity has driven the Trump and the Project 25 agendas. Toxic men with too much power (Musk, Joe rogan etc) are fueling things to suit their own mysoginist ends. The fact women have voted for all this exposes that this is about patriarchy.
A few people have also expressed their personal experience - fear sees women go silent, do what their husband says, stick to the "tribe" etc.
Agreed. And all good points worth thinking about!
I think my trust in *most* men eroded in 2016. But I still had trust in women. Now, my trust in women is dependent on geography. If I'm in my area in New England, I know where most women stand. If I travel south, I'll be more on guard with both men... and women.
I read this through my tears. Thank you, Sarah, and Anya, for your personal take. I don't feel as alone. The struggle to forgive men has been the struggle of my life. That's sounding pretty hyperbolic, but I think it's true. And this election is a mirror reflecting it all back. Men (especially young men) came out in droves in this election. I think I heard that more women voted for Biden in 2020 than they voted for Harris. I think more and more women will stay quiet. Where do we go from here?
I think a lot of women have been trying to do the same most of their lives, too.
We do stay quiet. I stayed quiet in the past and the truth is that I can't explain why. I do not know why I stayed quiet, maybe I didn't trust my own judgement, I didn't recognise the mistreatment. I froze when I read your words just now.
Your brutal honest with yourself Kristy inspires me.
Me too. Its true. The fight seems futile..
Yet we know it necessary..
The problem is conflict , and our inability to fight fairly and completely. I understand the dilemma, to lower your guard to someone who has the ability to render your heart. It’s almost impossible. But I think the solution is in the fight. I have been thinking about this a lot lately. THE first choice in a partner, friend or business partner is how they deal with conflict , either with you , or more importantly with a stranger they can’t get something from.
This behaviour is the baseline of a human being, life is hard and stressful, and how someone deals y stress immediately tells you their values, and character.
Love this conversation. I too have noticed a huge difference to how this feels in my body and heart, compared to 2016. Less of a debilitating drowning, but rather a deep constant hum of grief, which feels very right, embracing and maybe even transitory??
The power of now having the scaffolding of this community, and the different narratives and greater curiosity I have been gifted with has changed everything.
Tara Brach says "I promise to love this world, in sickness and in health, til death do us part." Today, loving the world is looking like tending to my exhaustion. I trust that love will let me know when it is calling me to action, but right now it's a good night's sleep, after soaking up all of your wisdom here.
That Tara Brach quote is lovely.
Sarah, I can't forgive US men and to a certain extent Australian men. I posted on X that I hoped the American women would carry the day, but many of them, including the vast majority of mainstream Republican men voted for Trump. The US is more polarised and fractured than ever before, possibly irrevocably... Trump represents all the reactionary, sexist, racist, homophobic, transphobic and elitist tendencies of the conservative half of the US. 20 years of reactionary SCOTUS decisions coming up. The country may never recover. Australia reflects some of this - we have another adversarial fight going on between, essentially, two conservative major parties who are the only parties who can form Government. In Queensland, they are heading towards a US style backlash against pro-women and welfare policies, such as the Right to Choose, child care and action on violence against women. In Australia, there have been 75 deaths of women at the hands of men and Governments are doing nothing about it. I'm at a loss. No more words!
Thank you Clive...please keep saying your words.
Yes, I'm watching Dutton et al capitalising on the momentum and it's cringe and scary. I just hope Australians jump from the warming pot on the stove and mobilise before it's too late.
Look into supporting minor parties and independents. Get involved at the grassroots level in your constituency. Lots of folk already doing great work in this realm. The more the merrier. We want a minority government with a strong cross bench to foster a more progressive political sphere and break up the stranglehold the major parties and their donors/powerful lobbyists have on our government. It will be a critical fork in the road in the Australian social/cultural landscape. Get active!
I had to leave X yesterday for good after being slammed and called horrible things by far right men and a few women (mostly Americans but some Australians) including an idiot, a retard, ugly, stupid, a commie, go to the kitchen, get an abortion, how many cats, etc. So much hate out there it’s frightening. What did I write? I said we would never vote for someone like Trump in Australia.