30,000-foot questions to shake up the world

for weddings, parties, anything...a thread

Did you catch my Wild episode this week The New York Times columnist David Brooks? He’s both one of America’s best-known conservative commentators and one of its most committed to pushing the case for deep moral discussion.

In the chat we talk about different techniques for having better conversations, eg “be a loud listener” and “turn the other person into a narrator”. Another is asking big, deep, challenging questions.

It’s not dissimilar to that bit in This One Wild and Precious Life where I invite readers to ask of another the Persian/Arabic version of “How are you?”:

In the podcast I promise to post a bunch of what David calls “30,000-foot questions”, ones that lift people out of their daily vantage points and help them see themselves from above. I think such questions can shake up a situation and get us all far more alive and awake. Really, can we be using precious time on this planet asking, “So what do you do?” and discussing the merits of local private schools?

Below is a mix of suggestions I gleaned from David, and a bunch I have personally used on dates, at dinner parties and the rest. They are largely about getting down into moral or values-led weeds.

Some shake up the party pearlers

• What crossroads are you at?

• If the next five years is a chapter in your life, what is the chapter about?

• Can you be yourself where you are and still fit in?

• What would you do if you weren’t afraid?

• If you died today, what would you regret not doing?

• What have you said yes to that you no longer really believe in?

• Would you pull the lever in the Trolley Problem?

• What is the no, or refusal, you keep postponing?

• In the chat, David refers to a journalist who asks people: “Why you?” Why was it you who started that business? Why was it you who ran for school board?

• Is it better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all?

• How do your ancestors show up in your life?

• Instead of asking, What do you think of that? ask, How did you come to believe that?

• What is the ruling passion of your soul?

• What does it mean to be a good human in today’s world?

Please do add a few yourself or answer any of the above that grab you?

Two other things:

1. I’ve landed in a bit of strife. I did a podcast interview with Stellar, which they then ran as an excerpt in the Sunday magazine insert in the two main News Corp newspapers here in Australia. It was a generous chat. Towards the end, I rant about the anti-intellectualism that abounds in Australian culture and media. I finish by saying, “I hope I haven’t trodden on any toes here, but I think it’s a time in history when we’ve got to answer honestly.” Anyway, I’m still hoping (no toes trodden on). And in the meantime I’ve been asked onto The Project this Friday to talk about it further. I’m choosing to trust it will be a fruitful experience and that the Daily Mail won’t do their usual salacious follow-up (they’ve already run one such off the back of the Stellar piece in the UK; I find them an etnertaining exercise in “count the number of lies”). I could’ve declined this additional interview. Except I DO think it’s a time in history when we’ve got to be honest and shake up parties and challenge each other and nations to go deeper and better. As many of you here know, I’ve spoken about this “you beaut” avoidant element of life in Australia here and here.

   

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2. I often recommend different books here and on Wild and thought I’d put a bunch of my favourite reads in one spot where you can buy them for yourself and loved ones for Christmas. You’re welcome.

Catch you next week.

Sarah xx