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I’m a new subscriber and I’m so glad I joined. I am a cancer survivor and this first chapter feels reminiscent (a parallel of but on a micro individual scale) of the period during cancer diagnosis and/or treatment when you’re waiting to learn if what the doctor can do, or has done, is going to save you. You are holding hope, some will be looking up all the alternate therapies that might help. You have people saying “you’re gonna be fine” not based on facts, just toxic positivity; others will say nothing. In my case treatment worked but if it didn’t I feel as though this chapter is where I would be at. Each person would handle this loss of hope in their own way. I look forward to the next chapter and seeing where this goes.

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The next chapter should sing to you. I make the parallel with being told you have a terminal illness. And, hoorah, for surviving! x

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I’m glad you’ll be using this analogy. When I first woke up to the severity of the crisis, it felt like I slipped into a parallel universe - like we have mass terminal cancer but everyone else is avoiding that fact. It’s been quite an (ongoing) process of making peace with that and returning to the only thing that’s actually important - to love as well as I can.

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I was thinking on the same lines. But I feel that if I give up on hope I will need to tackle grief and I'm just not ready for that.

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that's fair enough...or maybe the conversation here will help

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Interesting you should say that. I think I’m already grieving but haven’t been able to name it for what it is.

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there's a word for it - anticipatory grief.

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Yes. I think I’ve been fluctuating between hope and grief for awhile, slowly coming through that…. Mostly with the help of Sarah and this community.

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Not sure what’s on the otherside though.

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Kate Bowlers pods and books🌸

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